The Big 3-0

Well, I'm 30. It feels weird to say that, since it seems like just yesterday I was turning 21 or 18 or 12 or something. So I'm 30. So what does that mean? Not a whole hell of a lot I guess.

My contract is ending soon here in Japan and once again (for like the 100th time) I'm at a crossroads. I'm engaged to be married, but still haven't set a date, so that gives my life a more definite direction. If I'm getting married that means I have to start working better jobs, right? Start getting a house, right? Start having kids, right? Right? What am I supposed to be doing? Is there a guideline? A rule book? What do I do? Huh?

Honestly, I don't know. And that's the beauty of it. I don't know at all. But as long as Kumi is with me, I'll be happy. We may come back to America. We may stay in Japan. We may go somewhere else. I don't know. Anywhere is fine with me.

It's strange how life can change so quickly. Just instantly things you are familiar with or take for granted can change. I realized that in 2010 when I had lots and lots of health issues (or fabricated ones). I live everyday like it's my last now. I enjoy life. I cherish it. I do everything I can to be happy. That's what sustains me.

So what will my 30s bring me that my 20s couldn't? If I could describe my 20s, it would be like this:

a. Very unhealthy. Smoked everyday, drank to excess, ate whatever I wanted.
b. Reckless. I did lots of reckless things. Especially with my body. I wasn't always careful and didn't always protect myself when I was wrestling. And I'm paying the price now.
c. Had absolutely no direction. My life just seemed to be wandering from one thing to the next with no clear definition at all. If I'm getting married soon, there can be no more of that (unless Kumi's cool with it).

So with a new year and a new age comes new aspirations. I've done many blogs like this before where I talk about how I'm going to write more or do more things in wrestling. Or I'm going to get some dream job or travel to some country. But I'm not going to do that anymore. I'm not going to talk about what I'm going to do.

I'll just do it.

30s. Here I am. Bring it on.